What is your life strategy? Do you have every last move planned out – including several escape routes and alternatives in case of change? Do you have no strategy whatsoever and just roll with the punches? Are you looking in the opposite direction so you don’t even see the punches coming? I got a questionnaire from http://www.luckspreader.com/ today, and filling it in made me realise something…I do have a life strategy – and most people would not consider it a strategy. Including me…until I thought about it!
When I asked you about your life strategy, what did you think of? Maybe it was a sporting analogy, or some kind of life map. Maybe the very word ‘strategy’ put you to sleep after all the ‘strategic meetings’ you’ve been forced to sit though at work. Maybe there was a big blank space where thoughts should be! Did you think ‘follow my intuition and reach for joy’? If so, e-mail me immediately and let me know because that’s what I do!
That’s my ‘strategy’ for life. And even if I say so myself, it’s a pretty bloody good strategy! With this particular strategy, it is impossible to lose. The very worst thing that can happen is that I enjoy myself (deary-me what a dreadful possibility!). A strategy is defined as a plan, method, or series of maneuvers or stratagems for obtaining a specific goal or result. What is the specific goal or result that you want for your life?
Most people want to have a ‘good life’ – which I define as a joyful life rather than a life full of stuff. I wonder if you have ever taken the time to state specifically what the goal from your life is? Maybe now’s a good time to do so…and to work out your strategy? Say for example your goal from life is to drive yourself into the ground, then your strategy could be to work 15 hours a day. Or your goal from life might be to be miserable, and your strategy is do stuff you hate that makes you unhappy.
I’m not sure entirely why you would want to do that…but so many people do that there must be a really good reason that I am missing altogether! Perhaps it is just that we do not take the time to think what our goal for life is, and what the strategy is to achieve it. Feel free to copy mine – Goal: To have a joyful life. Strategy: Follow my guidance and enjoy life. It’s working well for me and the clients I have shared it with!
Something to play with
If someone else were to look at your life right now, what might they say the strategy and goal are? Would they say it was to complain incessantly and end up bitter and twisted? To be very driven and to be financially successful? To embrace mayhem and have a barmy life? What is your real goal for your life? What do you want your life to be? And what is your strategy to get there?
Monday, June 30, 2008
Friday, June 27, 2008
Was that worth giving up your peace for?
I was reading a blog entry at http://blog.yourangelsmessage.com/2008/06/26/june-26-2008.aspx today and this question caught my eye “Was that worth giving up your peace for?” What has made you give up your peace today? What has made you angry, irritable, stressed, freaked out? Was it worth giving up your peace?
For me, it was a lorry drifting into my lane on the dual carriageway, prompting a furious beeeeeeeeeeeeeeep and a lot of swear words. Was it worth giving up my peace for? No, absolutely not! A little ‘hello I’m here’ cheery beep would have done the trick, and wouldn’t have had the same negative impact on my blood pressure!
So, next time I get in the car, I have to remember that no matter what the other drivers do, I’m not giving up my peace for them!
In peace and love
Donna.x
Thursday, June 26, 2008
From the Mouths of Babes
Today I received this e-mail about what Love means to a 4-8 year old . . .
"When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails any more.
So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love." Rebecca- age 8
"When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth." Billy - age 4
"Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other." Karl - age 5
"Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs." Chrissy - age 6
"Love is what makes you smile when you're tired." Terri - age 4
"Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK." Danny - age 7
"Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more. My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss" Emily - age 8
"Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen."
Bobby - age 7
"If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate," Nikka - age 6
"Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday." Noelle - age 7
"Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well." Tommy - age 6
"During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling. He was the only one doing that. I wasn't scared
anymore." Cindy - age 8
"My mommy loves me more than anybody. You don't see anyone else kissing me to sleep
at night." Clare - age 6
"Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken." Elaine-age 5
"Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford." Chris - age 7
"Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day." Mary Ann - age 4
"I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones." Lauren - age 4
"When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you."
Karen - age 7
"Love is when Mommy sees Daddy on the toilet and she doesn't think it's gross." Mark - age 6
"You really shouldn't say 'I love you' unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget." Jessica - age 8
And the final one -- Author and lecturer Leo Buscaglia once talked about a contest he was asked to judge. The purpose of the contest was to find the most caring child. The winner was a four year old child whose next door neighbour was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife.
Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman's yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there. When his Mother asked what he had said to the neighbour, the little boy said, "Nothing, I just helped him cry"
Tonight, raise your glass in a toast to love...in all its' forms!
Love
Donna.x
"When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails any more.
So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love." Rebecca- age 8
"When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth." Billy - age 4
"Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other." Karl - age 5
"Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs." Chrissy - age 6
"Love is what makes you smile when you're tired." Terri - age 4
"Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK." Danny - age 7
"Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more. My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss" Emily - age 8
"Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen."
Bobby - age 7
"If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate," Nikka - age 6
"Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday." Noelle - age 7
"Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well." Tommy - age 6
"During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling. He was the only one doing that. I wasn't scared
anymore." Cindy - age 8
"My mommy loves me more than anybody. You don't see anyone else kissing me to sleep
at night." Clare - age 6
"Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken." Elaine-age 5
"Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford." Chris - age 7
"Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day." Mary Ann - age 4
"I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones." Lauren - age 4
"When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you."
Karen - age 7
"Love is when Mommy sees Daddy on the toilet and she doesn't think it's gross." Mark - age 6
"You really shouldn't say 'I love you' unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget." Jessica - age 8
And the final one -- Author and lecturer Leo Buscaglia once talked about a contest he was asked to judge. The purpose of the contest was to find the most caring child. The winner was a four year old child whose next door neighbour was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife.
Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman's yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there. When his Mother asked what he had said to the neighbour, the little boy said, "Nothing, I just helped him cry"
Tonight, raise your glass in a toast to love...in all its' forms!
Love
Donna.x
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
The Serenity Reminder
This is BY FAR the best picture I have EVER taken! Isn't it beautiful? I have this as my screen saver, I've been sharing it with everyone I know, and I am getting notecards and posters made from it! Yes, I love it!
Not just because it's a beautiful image, but because it reminds me of that holiday mellowness that I am bringing back into my "real" life. One look at this picture and I am instantly transported back to a magical moment - relaxed, happy, (well fed, but that is incidental!), tranquil, serene. The sad truth is that most of our lives are not as relaxed, happy, tranquil and serene as we would like, so we need these reminders.
So, what reminders do you have surrounding you? To-do lists, clutter, mayhem? Or beautiful tranquil scenes that remind you of great times?
Maybe it's time to go through your photo album?
Love
Donna.x
Monday, June 23, 2008
OnTheBeach - The Back from Holiday Blues
Thank you guys, for missing me!! I have had a few e-mails asking where the heck I've been and why have you got nothing to read on a Monday morning - I really appreciate that you noticed and cared that I'd gone. And for those of you who didn't notice or care…I've been on holiday! I've been in Tenerife for a wedding - beautiful day, beautiful bride and I had big hair…what more can one ask for? Well, summer in England for a start. But there are some things you cannot guarantee…summer in England is one of them!
- The Back from Holiday Blues -
Oh, boy, did I NOT want to come back from my holidays! I was enormously sulky about the whole business. Not only did I not want to come back, but the pilot compounded my lack of enthusiasm by announcing over Exeter that Birmingham was "shrouded in cloud, with 25 miles per hour cross winds, raining and 13 degrees". Oh yip, fly faster. I am not a good flyer either so I spent the entire (interminable) landing clutching the arm rests and my rosary beads, wishing they'd let me jump out (much less scary) or land the plane somewhere where there were not 25 mph cross winds!
Now I've had a few days to recover from the ordeal and get used to wearing warm clothes again, I can't really say I'm delighted to be back…but I am letting go of the holiday blues! In days gone by, it would be August before I was back to 'normal' but these days I kind of enjoy a couple of days of misery, then I get on with making things better. The interesting thing is that I love what I do, and still I have the back from holiday blues! Nowadays though, I love it when this type of thing happens because it shows me where things need to change.
What I loved about my holiday (apart from glorious weather, lots of nice food, the sea and watching beautiful sunsets from my balcony) was that I had space. Space to think, space to just wander around for a few hours, space to sit in the sun reading a book for hours, space to go swimming in the Atlantic or the rooftop pool, space to just be. Despite the fact that life is 100 times better than it was 5 years ago, it is still quite packed with things to 'do'. I am one of these people who is never bored - there's always something to read, write, watch, somewhere to go, people to get in touch with.
On holiday all that got left behind…and even though I was out there for a wedding and there were always people around and parties to be attended, there was spare time for purposeless pottering. Oh, I do this at home too, but I get irritated that I have wasted 10 hours puttering about! So over the coming weeks, I am going to be simplifying, decluttering, creating space in many ways and bringing more of that 'holiday' feeling to my life. And (when it's not raining) I shall be finding a place where I can watch the sun set. A key ingredient of a happy life!
So, I guess that you are preparing for holiday season too? At least in this hemisphere. Do you get the holiday blues? Does it take you months to get over them? Do you use the experience to change something about your life to make it better and more 'OnTheBeach'? Or do you use it as a stick with which to beat yourself about how much life sucks? You don't have to sell your house and move to Spain to make changes that will give you that 'holiday' feeling. Small steps, small changes, and the back from holiday blues will help you make your life AMAZING!
- Something To Play With -
You don't need to wait til you come back from a holiday to start making changes - think now about what gives you the post-holiday blues. If there's a list of 200 things, cool - you have lots of ways you could change your life!! Pick one thing, just one, that would be quite easy to change…and bring some of that holiday magic to your normal life! Want to share your thoughts on this article? E-mail me. I love to hear from readers, and will respond to all e-mails.
- The Back from Holiday Blues -
Oh, boy, did I NOT want to come back from my holidays! I was enormously sulky about the whole business. Not only did I not want to come back, but the pilot compounded my lack of enthusiasm by announcing over Exeter that Birmingham was "shrouded in cloud, with 25 miles per hour cross winds, raining and 13 degrees". Oh yip, fly faster. I am not a good flyer either so I spent the entire (interminable) landing clutching the arm rests and my rosary beads, wishing they'd let me jump out (much less scary) or land the plane somewhere where there were not 25 mph cross winds!
Now I've had a few days to recover from the ordeal and get used to wearing warm clothes again, I can't really say I'm delighted to be back…but I am letting go of the holiday blues! In days gone by, it would be August before I was back to 'normal' but these days I kind of enjoy a couple of days of misery, then I get on with making things better. The interesting thing is that I love what I do, and still I have the back from holiday blues! Nowadays though, I love it when this type of thing happens because it shows me where things need to change.
What I loved about my holiday (apart from glorious weather, lots of nice food, the sea and watching beautiful sunsets from my balcony) was that I had space. Space to think, space to just wander around for a few hours, space to sit in the sun reading a book for hours, space to go swimming in the Atlantic or the rooftop pool, space to just be. Despite the fact that life is 100 times better than it was 5 years ago, it is still quite packed with things to 'do'. I am one of these people who is never bored - there's always something to read, write, watch, somewhere to go, people to get in touch with.
On holiday all that got left behind…and even though I was out there for a wedding and there were always people around and parties to be attended, there was spare time for purposeless pottering. Oh, I do this at home too, but I get irritated that I have wasted 10 hours puttering about! So over the coming weeks, I am going to be simplifying, decluttering, creating space in many ways and bringing more of that 'holiday' feeling to my life. And (when it's not raining) I shall be finding a place where I can watch the sun set. A key ingredient of a happy life!
So, I guess that you are preparing for holiday season too? At least in this hemisphere. Do you get the holiday blues? Does it take you months to get over them? Do you use the experience to change something about your life to make it better and more 'OnTheBeach'? Or do you use it as a stick with which to beat yourself about how much life sucks? You don't have to sell your house and move to Spain to make changes that will give you that 'holiday' feeling. Small steps, small changes, and the back from holiday blues will help you make your life AMAZING!
- Something To Play With -
You don't need to wait til you come back from a holiday to start making changes - think now about what gives you the post-holiday blues. If there's a list of 200 things, cool - you have lots of ways you could change your life!! Pick one thing, just one, that would be quite easy to change…and bring some of that holiday magic to your normal life! Want to share your thoughts on this article? E-mail me. I love to hear from readers, and will respond to all e-mails.
Wednesday, June 04, 2008
I DID IT!
Last night at Toastmasters I did my 10th advanced level speech and I got my 'Advanced Communicator - Bronze' Award. Yay me! Woo hoooooo!!
The purpose of this post is threefold:
1 - to big up myself
2 - to encourage you to big up yourself - seriously, it's not arrogant to talk yourself up, it is only right to allow yourself to be proud of you and tell the world. Yay me!!! Ahem.
And 3 - if you would like to gain more confidence and learn to speak confidently in front of a roomful of people - check out toastmasters. Right now. I joined a little over 3 years ago and I have got so much more than I ever expected from my membership.
And just in case you didn't realise, I am SO proud of myself!!
Love
Donna.x
The purpose of this post is threefold:
1 - to big up myself
2 - to encourage you to big up yourself - seriously, it's not arrogant to talk yourself up, it is only right to allow yourself to be proud of you and tell the world. Yay me!!! Ahem.
And 3 - if you would like to gain more confidence and learn to speak confidently in front of a roomful of people - check out toastmasters. Right now. I joined a little over 3 years ago and I have got so much more than I ever expected from my membership.
And just in case you didn't realise, I am SO proud of myself!!
Love
Donna.x
Tuesday, June 03, 2008
Trust your creativity
As you may know, I write a weekly newsletter - yesterday's "Bit by bit by bit" I was delighted with when I first finished it. But on the last read through (when I had no time to re-write) I wasn't as happy with it. Trusting my original creativity, I sent it anyway...and I have received more e-mails about this article than any other this year!
This is not a new phenomenon - often when I am unsure of a newsletter, it strikes a chord with certain readers. 3 of them this week said it felt like the universe was asking the very question they asked. So today, if you're asking a question, trust that someone somewhere is working on the answer and be prepared to hear it. And if you're the one sending the message, trust that your timing and subject are exactly right for someone out there.
Love
Donna.x
This is not a new phenomenon - often when I am unsure of a newsletter, it strikes a chord with certain readers. 3 of them this week said it felt like the universe was asking the very question they asked. So today, if you're asking a question, trust that someone somewhere is working on the answer and be prepared to hear it. And if you're the one sending the message, trust that your timing and subject are exactly right for someone out there.
Love
Donna.x
Monday, June 02, 2008
OnTheBeach: Bit by Bit by Bit by Bit by Bit
I had the excellent fortune to get a ticket for the Abraham Hicks workshop in London this week, and a fabulous time was had by all. Esther Hicks is an inspirational speaker who dialogs with a group of spiritual teachers who call themselves Abraham. It might seem a bit 'woo-woo' to some, but it's fascinating stuff - and much of their teachings can be easily translated to the 'real' world. For example, bit by bit by bit by bit.
You see, we all want to go from skint to millionaires in 2 steps, from single to married in a heartbeat, from miserable to joyful in a day and a half (less if we can manage it!). So we go through a circuit of determination, followed by disillusionment when the thing we want doesn't appear instantly, followed by despair, and again and again. Ok, maybe I exaggerate slightly (you'll be astonished to note!).
I have seen it many times - people get really angry with themselves for not being fitter, faster, stronger, better. An entirely self-defeating practice if ever I heard one. While we are on the way to achieving what we want to achieve, we rarely stop to notice that we are getting there, that progress (however miniscule) is being made, that each step we take brings us closer to where we want to be in life.
Take a joyful life for example. I went from being a total misery-guts who contemplated suicide in the 90's (only briefly, and I wasn't very serious about it) to being 'DonnaOnTheBeach' - the woman who, a friend told me yesterday, is 'all about joy'. Did I make this leap from despair to joy in 10 minutes? Did I stop mid-sentence and change my attitude? Did I have a personality transplant? No, to all 3 questions! (although some of my friends find the change incredible!)
So how did I do it? Bit by bit by bit by bit by bit by bit by bit by bit by bit by bit by bit by bit by bit by bit by bit by bit by bit…you get the message right?! Step by step. And sometimes I felt like nothing was happening at all, like I wasn't moving, like nothing was changing. But it was - bit by bit. They say a watched pot never boils, and it's the same with personal changes! Because you are with you all the time, you can't see the changes that are happening…but they are. Bit by bit.
- Something To Play With -
What would you really like your life to be like? What would you love to have in your life? Stop for a moment and notice how far you have already come. Notice that changes are happening - bit by bit. And that they will continue to happen, bit by bit…just let go of your impatience (a subject for another day!). Want to share how this article affects you? E-mail me. I love to hear from readers, and will respond to all e-mails.
You see, we all want to go from skint to millionaires in 2 steps, from single to married in a heartbeat, from miserable to joyful in a day and a half (less if we can manage it!). So we go through a circuit of determination, followed by disillusionment when the thing we want doesn't appear instantly, followed by despair, and again and again. Ok, maybe I exaggerate slightly (you'll be astonished to note!).
I have seen it many times - people get really angry with themselves for not being fitter, faster, stronger, better. An entirely self-defeating practice if ever I heard one. While we are on the way to achieving what we want to achieve, we rarely stop to notice that we are getting there, that progress (however miniscule) is being made, that each step we take brings us closer to where we want to be in life.
Take a joyful life for example. I went from being a total misery-guts who contemplated suicide in the 90's (only briefly, and I wasn't very serious about it) to being 'DonnaOnTheBeach' - the woman who, a friend told me yesterday, is 'all about joy'. Did I make this leap from despair to joy in 10 minutes? Did I stop mid-sentence and change my attitude? Did I have a personality transplant? No, to all 3 questions! (although some of my friends find the change incredible!)
So how did I do it? Bit by bit by bit by bit by bit by bit by bit by bit by bit by bit by bit by bit by bit by bit by bit by bit by bit…you get the message right?! Step by step. And sometimes I felt like nothing was happening at all, like I wasn't moving, like nothing was changing. But it was - bit by bit. They say a watched pot never boils, and it's the same with personal changes! Because you are with you all the time, you can't see the changes that are happening…but they are. Bit by bit.
- Something To Play With -
What would you really like your life to be like? What would you love to have in your life? Stop for a moment and notice how far you have already come. Notice that changes are happening - bit by bit. And that they will continue to happen, bit by bit…just let go of your impatience (a subject for another day!). Want to share how this article affects you? E-mail me. I love to hear from readers, and will respond to all e-mails.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
